Patricia (Pat) Mathews
mathews@unm.edu
---------- Forwarded message ----------
Date: Thu, 13 Nov 1997 18:20:46 GMT
From: Jean Lamb <tlambs@magick.net>
To: mathews@unm.edu
Subject: Re: OT: But wait! There's more!
(from Chuck Lipsig)
Additional Rules for Heroines:
10. I will not swoon in the heros arms, nor pull on him to get him
away when he is trying to aim.
11. If the hero pulls me away from the fray just as I have lined up
my shot, I will thank him, then beat him within an inch of his life,
at a reasonable time.
12. I will not turn down the hero's romantic overtures on the sole
basis of having though him dead and having finally managed to deal
with life without him.
13. I will wear clothing and shoes that are practical for running,
fighting, and carrying heavy objects in. If seduction is necessary
and not achievable in practical clothes, it can be achieved by
selective removal or ripping of outfit.
14. I will find out who the villain's clothing designer is and
employ him or her to design my wedding night lingerie.
15. I will spend some time in cardio-vascular training. When we
flee the villain, I'm not going to be the one who begs to stop and
rest for a bit.
16. I will not stomp out on the hero, telling him how insensitive to
me he is. He may have other things on his mind at the moment and,
hopefully, there will be a quiet time after all the fuss and turmoil
to tell him what an unthinking cretin he has been without endangering
the kingdom/planet/universe.
17. If he's too uncertain, shy, or nervous to propose, I will.
Women are allowed to take the initiative in this literary day and
age.
18. Special for heroines who are involved with other people than the
hero, are Lesbians, or both. I will not get upset if the hero makes
a pass at me. He can't know if he hasn't asked. However, once I've
made my statust clear to him, I reserve the right, after other
problems have been solved, to flay him within an inch of his life if
he persists in his attempts.
Chuck Lipsig lipsig@atlantic.net Gainesville, FL
Jean Lamb, from Klamath Falls, Oregon, tlambs@magick.net
http://www.sff.net/people/jeanlamb. Just hired to work part-time at a
library near me! (whip me, beat me, MAKE me get paid for working with books!).
This archive was generated by hypermail 2b29 : Thu May 25 2000 - 19:07:19 PDT